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Thursday, January 12, 2017

SEVEN CONSIDERATIONS FOR BUILDING EXTENDED FAMILY



SEVEN CONSIDERATIONS FOR BUILDING EXTENDED FAMILY

As a student of African culture, and one who was in the process of building an Extended Family, before committing to build first, with who I now, consider my Soul Mate. Before my current relationship, me and prospective wives hagreed to several considerations:

1. The first wife, and each wife after must agree to adding another, and should be involved in the decision of who the additional wife should be. This is empowering to the women and shows them the respect they deserve. Women must have equal weight in the decision making process of any and all family matters, and consensus must be a part of this process.

2. The wives must commit to becoming friends and sisters to one another, to reduce any need for any one or more to compete with the other.

3. Each one in the family must have a defined role and function in the family. IN my family, concept, one wife would be responsible for the Home and House management. This may also involve caring for a garden, to grow our own food. Another will manage affairs of the children, though all are responsible for parenting. Another will work part time as she is a Computer Engineer, and would also work with me in taking care of Family Business Affairs.

4. There is no hierarchy among the children, and each adult is parent to all of the children, thus providing multiple role models.

5. All revenues coming in to the family go into a pool or joint account to pay all family bills. The residual revenue is divided equally and goes into a Trust Account for each family member. If one chooses to leave, they take their trust with them.

6. The family as a unit seeks to build a support system around the family which shares values and/or practices which serves to re-enforce Extended FAmily principles and ethics, and values.

7. The family must engage in liberational projects as the family is an example of how our cultural nation should function, thus, building communal and collective institutions which are people focused, rather than profit motivated. As an extended family, practicing cooperative economics and communal living, these concepts can be transferred to the building of a larger community, and in fact, the Nation Building process. In this conceptual framework, the family becomes a liberational project in itself.

The conceptual basis for the considerations above, is that Extended Family is first for the Empowerment of Women, not the whims, greed or desires of men; EF is a social institution which primary purpose it to rebuilt the strength of the Black Family; EF is an economic unit which re-enforces the concept of Community and Cooperative Economics; EF is a liberational project which contributes to Nation Building in the Global Pan African context.





THE VALUE DIMENSIONS OF LOVE MAKING

Upendo wa Kiroho is Swahili for Spiritual Love and the African version of Tantra, which actually had beginnings in Ancient Kemet. Upendo wa Kiroho is based on the concept of two spirits meeting, mingling and merging together in oneness while embarking on a Journey together to destinations unknown, but which elevate the spirit, allowing them to ascend toward a righteous togetherness. Love-making is the highest form of spiritual unity in the human realm. It allows us to unite with and traverse the universe. This is what it is in its highest form and expression. Upendo wa Kiroho is defined by Self Mastery of speech, thought, conduct and emotion. It is this self mastery which connects us with the Divine within our Spirit. Self mastery is more concretely expressed by developing the capacity to get into your mate or lovers head and heart, in meaningful ways. Upendo can be expressed in a myriad of ways, from hugging, caressing, bathing, massage, foot rubs, kissing, or Sacred gazing. We have come to bring a new way of living and loving in accord with the virtues of Ma'at. When we say we want/wish to do Ma'at, it means we seek to enter into a Sacred Union, allowing our Temples to Worship together in Universal Love. This is the lesson of our Ancestors. Ase'






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